I will go on
by SniperGirl0907
Summary: SUMMARY: Movieverse. An autobot sniper looks back on the last two years of his life since arriving on earth and how one girl and her cousins have taught him that there's more to life than just being a sniper. OC/OC


Well this is my first fanfic folks! enjoy and R&R at the end, Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Transformers; only my OC's and plot.

SUMMARY: Movieverse. An autobot sniper looks back on the last two years of his life since arriving on earth and how one girl and her cousins have taught him that there's more to life than just being a sniper. OC/OC

I WILL GO ON

Life

When you stop to think about it, it's a strange thing that works in even stranger ways.

There's a whole multitude of countless things that happens in a lifetime, but perhaps one of the most significant things to happen is change.

To lead a whole life swimming in the seemingly endless sea of war and destruction, to fight for so long and so hard that all that mattered before no longer carries the same value and to not think about or even consider the possibility of an end to it all.

And then as drastically as it began, it ends just as abruptly.

And then you find yourself at the end, with no more targets to eliminate and no more enemies to fight. After enduring so much and striving for so long to stay alive, you come realise, that it was ultimately for nothing. Our greatest enemy was gone, and with him the only means to save Cybertron and our kind from extinction.

I thought that was the end, nothing else except waiting for the inevitable.

Here I was, on a world rich in organic life and no idea where the other autobots were, I didn't know what to do or where to turn, in short, I was lost, in both my life and my mind. I had never felt so down before and although I prefer to work alone, for the first time in a long time, I genuinely felt lonely.

That was 2 years ago.

In the time between then and now I went through so much, experienced so many new things, and met new friends. Some 9 million years ago, if you asked me whether or not organic life could attain sentience I would have blown it off as shier nonsense. But now, here I am, living among an incredible race of organics called Homo sapiens (or humans for short). Although when I first saw these little beings I wasn't initially impressed, how was it one of these beings, so small and weak could possibly bring down Megatron in one fail swoop? Back then I was baffled and somewhat sceptical but that all changed when I met one human by the name of Morwenna. (Morri for short)

She was young by human standards, and so infinitely young by cybertronian standards (22 years of age is barely out of protoform stage!) from the very start she both confounded and amazed me, and her cousins were just as intriguing.

Her closest Cousin Tom is a bit of a prankster at spark but he's both kind, loyal and always stands by you as a friend. I learnt from him first hand that humans can be quite resourceful and are more than capable of using their small size to their advantage against a much larger opponent. (Namely me, I was a victim of one of his infamous pranks; it was the first and last time I ever took a humans size for granted)

But he cares much for his family and I truly admire his courage to stand up for those can't defend themselves, if he was a cybertronian there'd be no doubt he'd be Optimus Prime's first choice of warrior.

Next be introduced to me was Danny, when he first saw me I thought he was going to go into stasis lock he's so nervous, jumpy and easy to surprise I really couldn't see why a person like Morri would let him hang around. But it was evident that she cares for him and loves him like a brother.

Despite his apparent nervous dispersion I discovered he has tried hard most of his young life to conquer his fear, but when pushed to extremes I was even more surprised by his hidden bravery. Once, when my hide-out accidently caught fire he rushed in pass the blaze to try and get me out, it soon ended in me recuing him. When I asked why do such a foolish and reckless thing he said it was because I was his friend.

Friend

I can't remember the last time I was called anyone's friend.

When you're a sniper you don't have the need for such things, your reputation is one that commands fear and as such I had been both respected and feared by my fellow autobots, but now, here was a 16 year old human who risked his life for me because I was his friend. I didn't know whether to believe humans were really that gullible and didn't know any better, or maybe, I was really valued enough to warrant friendship from these little beings.

Regardless, I found myself appreciating Danny's act of heroism.

Finally there's Ashley, the youngest at 12 he certainly astounded me; he's loud, outspoken and certainly is one not to back down from a fight (he definitely wasn't put off by my size when we first met!)

And I have to say I did find him a little irritating at first, he's not the most patient human sparkling to deal with, in addition to his attitude he's easily hot-headed and has a tendency to get into trouble (namely accompanying Tom on his pranks around their village or fighting with the other human youngsters at that place called 'school')

He reminded me much of the younger rookies during the early days of the war, enthusiastic, impatient and thought they knew everything there was to know about combat.

Back then I hated working with anyone who thought he was indestructible, all too often that was how they got killed on the battlefield, pride is not an excuse for experience and I had no time for anyone who didn't take his profession seriously.

But Ashley was different, for all his attitude and temper he's protective of his older cousins and when given the chance, will try his best to bear the responsibilities of his actions.

But above all, I admire Morri the most; I've learnt she's a human of many contrasts. She's kind, humorous, intelligent and understanding, she has a deep passion for her people's cultural arts, and she admires and respects the other organic creatures of this world.

But she can also be bold and serious at times, she believes firmly in equality and fairness among others and will argue to put a point across.

I also learnt abruptly that she's not one to be taken for a fool, she may be kind and generous and willing to give the benefit of the doubt, but I was impressed with her ability to sense an uneasy situation. She was many things, but above all, she was a free spirit.

They were all free spirited in their own ways.

These humans were the first I ever met, and had the most profound impact on me, since then, life for me had never been the same.

Over the past 2 years I've adjusted to my new life on earth, being helped by these 4 delightful little humans. It's so very different to my old life.

My life during the war.

For as long as I can remember my life has been that of a sniper.

Before then I don't believe there was anything much before then.

Back in the very early days of the war, the time when Megatron's force first struck against us I was a young rookie gunner with the autobot forces, back then despite the destruction and devastation; it seemed simpler somehow, it was straight forward, we knew what we had to do and we knew what was at stake.

But then came that one day when the course of the war changed forever.

The destruction of Iacon and the following destruction of Crystal City.

So many were lost so needlessly

So many innocent lives

So many families

My sparkmate

My daughter

Lost in the name of greed and power

I lost everything that day, my life was forever changed, I now had nothing to lose.

From that moment on I was different; I fought with a new purpose and goal in mind, to make the Decepticons pay for all they had done and everything they would do.

I felt I was on fire all the time, wanting to burn away every enemy in my path.

I wanted make them suffer

Make them know the meaning of pain

And let them know that death and terror had a new servant in me.

As a gunner I did so much damage and killed so many, I lost track of myself in all the hatred, at that point nothing else mattered, no-one mattered, I had grown distant from friends and alienated myself from everyone. Only revenge was what I wanted. Then one day, I was offered the opportunity of a lifetime,

When I was approached by him.

Who was he? I really don't know, and considering how long ago it was, it really doesn't matter anymore.

What does matter is that he found me, he had known about me for some time, knew of my reputation on the battlefield, knew of my loss.

He offered me the chance to try and turn this war around, to try and do some real damage to Megatrons forces with real heavy firepower and to put the Decepticons in their place, and let them know that we were the one force in existence not to be messed with.

So I accepted

I was taken to the secret labs deep under the remains of Iacon

And was transformed into...something entirely different.

I remember it well

The moment I woke up from the procedure was unlike anything I had ever felt before.

So much power

So much strength

So much precision

And the endless possibilities to do so much more than before

I was then introduced to the others he had transformed

And together we became the 9

From that moment on we fought the Decepticons from the shadows of the war

Hacking enemy data lines and signals, infiltrating enemy bases, intercepting weapons and supplies, going behind enemy lines, eliminating vital and strategic targets and many other such activities.

It was simple, he feed us the information, and we did what needed to be done, back then, I loved my job and I the loved war.

I can't believe I actually once said those words, and with such hatred in my spark.

So the war pressed on and we carried on our duty regardless, nothing really seemed to change at that point in the war.

Until we heard the news that the battle of Tyger Pax ended with the allspark being jettisoned into outer space with Megatron in hot pursuit.

With considerable loses to both sides.

After that everything changed

It was as if the war had descended into the pit and everyone slowly began to go insane. The fighting and the endless destruction escalated to such an immense scale that not once did anyone stop to think if this worth the cost of life, it had become a war for the sake of war and no-one even gave consideration the vast collateral damage we were doing to the planet until it was too late.

Cybertron was now a lifeless husk

Thrown from its orbit, drifting in the endless dark void of space.

There was nothing left of our home.

No life, no people, no future.

I know I should have grieved for what we squandered and lossed, but I was still too full of hatred to care about anything else.

We decided to join Optimus Prime and his remaining autobots, we were about to depart when suddenly...

We had been betrayed

The ship was destroyed

I was catapulted far into space

And there I drifted

For how long? I can't remember anymore and at that point I didn't really care.

I had lost my fellow soldiers and any drive in me left to fight was gone too.

So I powered down my weaponry systems, took all non-essential systems and programmes offline leaving only my long-range scanner's active, slipped into recharge mode, and waited.

How long I stayed in that recharge cycle is anyone's guess, even I don't know, or remember.

In the endless, lightless void I waited.

For a sound

A sign

Anything to let me know I wasn't alone.

Then, suddenly, I heard it.

"_...With the All Spark gone, we cannot return life to our planet. And fate has yielded its reward: a new world to call home. We live among its people now, hiding in plain sight, but watching over them in secret, waiting, protecting. I have witnessed their capacity for courage, and though we are worlds apart, like us, there's more to them than meets the eye. I am Optimus Prime, and I send this message to any surviving Autobots taking refuge among the stars. We are here. We are waiting"._

The war was over?

The allspark gone too?

I didn't know what to believe

My purpose for fighting

My way of life

All over.

Following the transmition, I made my way to its point of origin.

The blue planet.

Earth.

However, upon entry into the atmosphere I accidently flew too close to the North Pole and the magnetic field threw off my telemetry and damaged my navigation systems. And instead of landing near the autobots new base I ended up landing on the far side of the planet on a large Island called Great Briton, In a small region called the South-West Country.

And that's where my little adventure began.

I found myself in quite a predicament, so I considered my situation and options and decided on what to do.

I had to find a way to contact Optimus Prime and let him know of my presence here on Earth, with my navigation systems damaged and my communication software non-functioning, there was no way I could fly to the autobots new base nedalone let them know of my arrival.

And somehow, whilst lost in my musings I had failed to notice the small organic being at my feet gawking up at me.

And that's how it all started

After discovering the World Wide Web I translated and learnt the native language, English

I said hello and she greeted me back

So we started talking.

From the very first moment I spoke to Morri I felt as if I had been a welcome guest (which confounded me to no end), she spoke to me with such kindness and listened in silence as I relayed my story and my life.

And through it all, I felt all the long centuries catch up to me, and for the first time I felt the weight of the war on my shoulders, and the sting of my past actions.

She somehow sensed my uneasiness and asked if she could help in anyway.

She found me shelter in a hanger on an abandoned airfield not far from her home, and offered to bring me supplies and to keep me company.

It was the first act of kindness anyone had ever shown me

I didn't understand

All my life I had shown no mercy to my enemies and even less tolerance and sympathy to my fellow autobots, I had earned a reputation as one of, if not the most infamous sniper on Cybertron, and yet here was a young human treating me with kindness I felt I had not rightly earned.

Never the less, she came to visit me every day.

Over the following several weeks we talked of many things together.

I told her of Cybertron and life before the war, but it was her life here on Earth that fascinated me the most, she spoke of so many strange and wondrous things.

The cycle of the seasons and weather, the organisms that inhabit the land, seas and skies and the various other human cultures all over the planet. Sometimes, often at dusk, we'd walk along cliffs on the airbase and sometimes even walk alongside the forest near her village.

Never in my 31 million years of existence could I have imaged such beauty would exist, so alive and so vibrant with colour.

But what really confused and humbled me the most about Morri was the way she always looked at me.

Her optics were such a dark shade of brown, they looked like two orbs of obsidian stone and yet they held such feeling and warmth.

But more importantly...they held innocence.

I however, was anything but innocent, back on cybertron I was described by many as having a "scary face" and even a "cold glare" and it's true, all the other autobots were afraid to approach and speak to me, I wasn't really friendly back then and I never smiled.

She was the first to not be put off by my face and she was the first to smile at me.

When I asked her why she wasn't afraid she replied...

"Well you do have a strong, firm face, but to be honest with you, when I first looked into your eye I saw someone who was more broken than scary, I got the impression something formidable had been there at one time, but...not anymore"

In that moment of honesty between us, I couldn't deniey what I had been feeling inside all this time, all of my bitterness rendered into grief and shame.

All of my past actions came flooding back, and in a moment that seem to stretch a lifetime I saw my life for what it had really been.

Anger, hate, pain, revenge, death

No hope of victory, no appreciation or respect for my fellow soldiers, I had held no value to anything or anyone, even the innocent.

What had I done?

How could I have been so cold and unfeeling?

How could I have become this?

I truly had nothing left inside

I was not worthy of life if all I had done was believe in death

When reality came back, she was standing there with my finger in her hands, she waved for me to come closer, and with her jacket sleeve she wiped the energon tears from my eye (I hadn't even realised I was crying), she leaned up and whispered...

"It's okay to be sad, I think you'll be fine now, whatever demons you've been carrying around, just let them go"

I didn't understand, how could she be so understanding? How could she comprehend what I've been through, what I've seen and done?

But in the tenderness of her touch, I felt something change inside, as if, in that one moment between us, all the darkness I had carried for so long was gently dispelled with a ray of cleansing light.

Absolution

For the first time in an eternity, I allowed myself to let go of everything, let all the sorrows and resentments flow away with my tears and be left in the shadows of the past.

And allow something new to fill my life

Peace

From then on I felt as though part of my spark had faded away, and something brighter had emerged in its place.

I found I was becoming lighter in my attitude and I felt better for letting myself feel all that I had denied myself for so long.

I felt great guilt for my actions

Regret for my ignorance

And I was finally able grieve for my family; Morri even helped me build a small shrine in their memory.

With Morri, I had found a new perspective on my life, I looked at everything on this world and realised humans were not excluded from the negative aspects of life also.

War, disease, sorrow

Death

And I thought I had it bad

And yet, despite all they endured and suffered, they never stopped living their life's, never give up and never concede to death until the very end.

They had such infinitely short lifespan's, barely a fraction in cybertronian terms, yet the difference didn't matter, it was the nature of human existence to be so mortal and yet so resilient.

For a long time I wondered why, if they were aware of their morality, why they didn't feel despaired all the time?

Morri was a prime example of this mystery, and her cousins, even after we were introduced and they got over their initial surprise, I still was baffled over their eagerness and drive.

Until the day Morri offered to teach me how to swim.

Last summer

It was one very hot day in July and my engines were starting to overheat and irritate me, my cooling system didn't seem to bring any relief and I was at a loss at what to do.

Then, Morri suggested I try cooling off in the sea, she and boys had been swimming earlier that day and said it helped beat the temperature. At first I thought they couldn't be serious, I was a sniper, designed for stealth and combat, I transform into a Cybertronian Stealth-class Sniper craft capable at near-impossible airial mernuvors and feats! Plus, my large metal bulk wouldn't help me achieve buoyancy easily.

But I was so hot and not feeling any better, so I thought it couldn't hurt to give it a try. I let the children sit on my shoulders and together we went to the secluded beach on the far side of the airstrip at the foot of the cliffs, away from prying eyes.

Once on the beach, Tom, Danny and Ashley all ran to the water, after scanning the water depth I discovered it was fairly deep, panicked that the boys might sink

I rushed to try and get them out. But Morri stopped me, saying it was okay, I looked back and was surprised to see the boys all floating on the water surface, (humans can float?).

Morri beckoned me to come and paddle about in the surf.

Paddle?

I scanned the sea floor again and discovered a rocky outcrop on the nearby reef which was large enough to support my weight and shallow enough to safely submerge on, 60 feet from the shore I slowly and tensely waded into the water, the cool water washing over my wings and engines felt so good, finally, relief from the heat!

The children latched onto my wings and took delight in being dragged through the water at a slow pace; humans find such delight in the simplest things.

Once on my perch, the children swam around and clambered about the rocks. I looked down at the deep, aqua waters and couldn't help but curious as to what was down there.

Closing up my turbines to stop my engines from flooding, I ducked my head under the water and submerged completely.

I wasn't prepared for what was down there.

It was dark, cold, and so very quiet.

Great huge swaths of kelp rolled and swayed about on the current, fish of varying sizes and colours darted about the sea floor in and out of rocky crevices and seals glided up and around the surface.

It was all so...beautiful.

They were beautiful

The children dived down and hung silently in the water, their pale flesh seemed almost luminous in the dim light, their hair swirled around like delicate wisps of vapour, so delicate in the way they moved I was afraid to reach out and touch them, for fear they would dissipate like a dream, like some strange ethereal spirits drifting on the verge of some far off realm.

Treading the thresh-hold of life and death.

That's when I finally understood.

Life is precious to humans because they know death is the inevitability of they're lives.

For us cybertronians we don't think about death because of our vast lifespan's, it doesn't even enter the equation so we initially take at it for granted.

Maybe that's part and part of how the war stretched out for so long, we thought it could afford to last for so long because we could try to outlive it.

But it wasn't an excuse for ignorance, and because of that ignorance we neglected that which we should have tried to preserve.

Life

Innocence

We squandered our lives for the sake of preserving our power.

And because that, our home, the only home we had ever known was destroyed.

There, in the endless silence of the Earth's oceans I found the resolution to my Absolution.

Life and death

As a sniper, I had directly dealt death upon others.

My life was death.

I looked up to towards the sun from under waves and started to ascend.

Now I will live my life for me.

I will live for every moment I can gain and enjoy it for all it's worth.

I will stay here on Earth, with Morri, Tom, Danny and Ashley, and resign myself to a life of peace and freedom.

I don't know if I deserve it, but I now know I want it.

I broke the surface and bathed in the warmth of the sun.

Renewed

Enlightened

I turned to Morri and she asked if I was okay.

"Yeah...everything will be fine now"

And I was fine, better then fine, for the first time since before the war.

I smiled.

She said it was my best feature.

The summer pasted away and life carried on, as it always does. Morri and Tom went back to college, Ashley and Danny went back to school, and I made a more permanent home of my hideout. I had been grounded for 18 months but I didn't mind, I had come to enjoy life on the ground, you see so much more then from way up in the sky, there were times I had actually forgotten what it was like to fly.

On the weekends Tom and Danny attempted to fix my damaged systems, Tom was training to be a mechanic and Danny was training to be a computer programmer, (although in secret he was a pro at hacking and creating viruses) so together they slowly repaired my circuits, according to the blueprints of my internal mechanisms I downloaded to Danny's laptop.

I have to say, they were extremely good.

It took several weekends to fully repair my systems but it finally paid off, As soon as the last switch was in place and all the access panels closed and sealed, I jumped up and hurried to the runway like an over-eager sparkling.

By way of thanks to the children, I offered to take them for ride.

I had never seen their faces light up so brightly before; it lifted my spark to see them so happy.

Once seated and strapped in, I transformed and taxied down to the main runway, firing up my main thrusters, it felt good to feel the plasma energy heat up in my engines again. One blast of the turbines and I thundered into the endless blue skies.

It was like flying for the first time, so exhilarating, powerful and so free. With every barrel-roll and turn, squeals and screams of delight rang out from my cockpit, this was freedom in its wildest form and I fell in love with it all over again. The children too were just as exhilarated; my internal scanners revealed their adrenaline and endorphin levels rise dramatically.

Five sparks, together, soaring free, lost in ecstasy.

I wished it could have lasted forever.

The sun was setting when I turned around to head back to the hideout, it had been a day well spent and I expected a good night's recharge.

But what I didn't expect was the enormous Lockheed C-5 Galaxy aircraft sitting on my runway.

We certainly didn't expect who the passengers were.

I hovered about 60 off the ground, cautious as to whom these strangers were, I told the children to stay inside me.(Ashley for once, didn't argue) waiting near the hanger was a small group of soldiers and two teenagers, they didn't seem put off by my appearance, they almost seemed to be expecting me.

I landed some 100 feet from the group, the rear ramp of the plane opened up and a large truck with red and blue flames rolled out followed by a smaller yellow vehicle with black stripes on the roof and hood.

"Who are you?" I asked over my fold-out speakers, instantly, the truck began to transform.

Another transformer

The children breathed a sigh of awe.

In a matter of seconds, the towering form of a mech stood before me.

"I am Optimus Prime, please state your name and function" he replied.

Optimus Prime?

The autobots...here?

I had completely forgotten all about them "Who are they?" Morri asked. For a moment I was taken aback, I wasn't sure what to do, cautiously, I opened my cockpit and told the children to get out and get behind me, they cambered down and once they were clear I transformed.

"My name is Deathshot, I am an Autobot sniper" I replied. As Prime greeted me with a warm smile I told the children it was safe and together we introduced ourselves to the Autobots.

We talked long into the night, and it turned out the autobots had been looking for me for some time, they were aware an unknown autobot had entered Earth's atmosphere some 18 months ago but lost track of the signal over the North Pole.

Prime explained he had been concerned about me, he had known of my reputation and infamously during the height of the war, to which I explained that it was a long time ago and that I had changed and wanted to live more peacefully now.

I was surprised at how understanding and reasonable he was; he spoke with reverence and wisdom, and a deep sense of passion for the Earth and the human race. I could see why so many of the autobots spoke so highly of him all those years ago. I could tell we were going to be good friends.

The children were getting well acquainted with the rest of the group too, the yellow car, a 2009 Camero, had transformed into a young autobot by the name of Bumblebee, an enthusiastic, happy-go-lucky bot who was official guardian to the two teens, Sam and Mikaela.

I learnt Sam had been the one who destroyed Megatron at the battle of Mission city, I looked at the boy, he didn't appear as anything special, but I knew better, I smiled at him and wondered just how lucky he had been.

After we had gotten acquainted, prime offered me to come back to the autobot base with them. I wanted to say yes, but I looked down at the children who were by my feet, and felt my spark sink.

I couldn't just leave them, I had come to care for them, gain their trust and friendship, I loved being around them, and especially around Morri.

I couldn't throw that away.

So I declined the offer.

But I did ask for one request.

I glanced over to Bumblebee and his charges, then back to Prime, and asked...

"Sir, with your permission, may I request to become the guardian of these children?"

"Permission granted"

A ring of cheers came up from between my feet as the children shouted their delight, even Sam, Mikaela and Bumblebee voiced their congratulations.

It was a great night, the happiest I had ever felt in a long time.

I had discovered the Autobots were alive and well.

I had made new friends

And I became an Autobot guardian.

That was six months ago.

With the help of the autobots, the American government bought the British government into their confidence about my presents here in England and have since informed me that the Royal Air Force has granted me a safe fly zone over my hideout, to which all but official military aircraft will be prohibited from flying over, and they'd allow me to stay, as long as I radio my flight plans to the MI6 HQ in London on an encrypted channel if I flew outside the fly zone.

I still stay in contact with Prime and the other autobots at their base (somewhere classified) in California,

A lot has happened in my time here on Earth

Several more autobots have arrived since the dramatic events at Mission City, and Jazz, one of Primes soldiers who fell during the battle, was successfully repaired and reawakened with the remaining allspark fragment.

A couple of the Decepticons turned sides too, namely Ravage, Scorpanok and Frenzy. Ravage crashed to Earth with severe damage to his CPU, once he was repaired, he was told of the allsparks fate, after some time in the brig to mull it over he defected and became an autobot. Frenzy was found at Hoover dam with half his head missing, and Scorpanok was recovered from the deserts of Iran with his tail missing. After being repaired and offered the chance to defect, they agreed, so now they help with training the humans at the base, and annoying Ironhide and the twins to no end.

Back here though, Morri made the bold move of letting her parents in on my existence, and my subsequent guardianship of her and Tom, Danny and Ashley. Needless to say the first meeting was much more awkward then it had been with Morri the first time. Her father was surprisingly impressed, but her mother is taking longer to 'warm up to me' as Morri puts it. She didn't run away screaming so it's a good sign I guess.

Life is such a strange thing, with so many strange aspect and elements that make it up.

It's wondrous

It's terrifying

It's awe-inspiring

But above all

Life is innocent.

It is the one greatest possession we are granted and the only one we have to live.

It cannot be hoarded needlessly nor taken in the name of power, it is time granted to us by the cycle of all living things.

And the changes that can occur within that time can prove to us that any and all things are possible.

That a merciless killer can become a free-loving and caring being is perhaps the greatest change for any being to achieve.

So now I sit here, watching the sun set over the sea with my charges at my side, Ashley and Danny arguing about something or other, Tom laughing at the silliness of the pair of them, and Morri, asleep in my lap.

I gently sweep back the hair from her face as I watch her sleeping form.

And think about all that has happened these past 2 years.

And what may happen tomorrow.

I don't know what the future holds for us, or what obstacles lay ahead, but I do know this.

Life will always go on

And so will I.

For life sake, for my sake, for their sake and especially for her sake.

I will go on.

The End.

* * *

There you go, hope it wasn't too bad, so now go to the reviews and lend me your opinio;)


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